Beyond Star River
2013 - 2014
Us
160 x 200 cm
OIl on Canvas
2013
"Us", refers to us human beings as a whole, in general. The painting, as well as the series, started from my questioning toward being human.
2013 was a year in which I so eagerly tried to find out a way to understand life. I was 21. I teared down so many rules that had been set formerly in my life, by society and family, by the appearances I was told to chase. I was sick of falseness. Suddenly my whole body and mind were open for new motivations. I found myself surrounded by questions. What is right, what is wrong? What is value, what is it all for? ... Since then, I found myself so far away from the way of life that I use to know. The distance in between, seemed like a galaxy that cannot be crossed. And somehow through there, a meaning has been granted to me.
"...Who are those building the high walls of rules and hide in their shadows to preserve reasons of greed? By fear and ignorance, minds that have been chained, spirits been decayed, souls been tortured, fallen from what life is true to be. A galaxy lies before the truth of all meanings, hardly to be crossed. How do I become me, free from the cage, desert what’s taken hold and pick up what’s been lost for long? What is it that leads me to a choice? To love, desire and create? What is it that circling there far beyond the darkness? What gives the value of a pursuit? What makes lives to be born and grow? What were all things created by and from where they began? And how do things join by their natures and to be bound to each other?
"I look upon the stars, to the essence presenting to me, the miracle I try to understand, the wisdom leads me to comprehend the meaning of the existence of each thing. By the truth that lives within all beings, by all pure essentiality that are created, I am filled with courage to believe that all what’s inside of me would shine out the glory of life, through its path to the salvation of my soul. That shall be my faith, upon the power that’s distributed among each one of us." -- Journal from 2013
I went through a lot of changes while working on this painting. Things happened and offered me the chances to know better, about society and people, about hatred and love. The government teared my studio down. Along with it, all what they had me believed were shattered. I finished this painting in a storage booth.
The Valley
200 x 300 cm
OIl on Canvas
2013 - 2014
A human figure coming out from woods and rocks, stepping into the water, and saw the reflection. The reflection of his own, the reflection of the stars.
"...Then I look down and see myself as another slim part among all of them. Too small to decide even for a tiny part of such an enormous plan; too shallow to understand how everything leads their own ways through the paths to future. I feel a burden upon me when I try to look beyond my sight. Fear to fall down to the power by which so many are enslaved; fear that one day the last thing I desire would turn out to be lost forever. Flashes of sensations would reflect back on what I may see and do and all become parts of what’s yet to come. Then I look down with pain and sorrow. In reflection I see all parts coming together as one, a whole course heading within certainty to the unknown. I see the lights of all stars gathering for me, shining gorgeously, in which I was created, all my natures, all as one. One part of what it should and shall be. Then I shall be true and always shall cherish all what’s true inside of me. For all that I wish. For all that I live. I look down, wishing to see the face of me, yet I see the entire universe, reflected in me." -- Journal from 2013-2014
I discovered this image in my head while my grand father was passing. It was the end of 2013. At the time many experiences were new me. Including death. The winter of Beijing was so cold. I was working on this painting for a month, in a warehouse without heating. One night the power went out, I held up a small candle toward the figure in the painting. It looked so calm and mystical. It was an unforgettable experience.
A while later, I heard for the first time the famous phrase by Carl Sagan: "We are the universe, contemplating itself." I couldn't help to think the sentence fits this painting perfectly. Dare I say, I get it.
My Huntsman
160 x 200 cm
OIl on Canvas
2013
Three characters emerge from a set of an unknown nature environment, an old man who's weary; a young man who's energetic; and a spiritual kind of figure between them. Together they form a trinity that performs a mental progress: In times of exhaustion and despair, one would lower down the body, find comfort, and with a new strength to be found, may continue the journey.
The source of hope brings anyone out of the darkness. It is what gives life. To quote Dante, "The path to Paradise begins in Hell." The painting was produced when I was 21 years old, in a cold storage unit after my studio was demolished by the government. At the time my personal belief system was coming to form. I would have to break down so many old concepts and seek to form new ones through the perspective of my own. In such a background, I painted this series and the mental progression led me to hope.
The painting was exhibited in Palazzo Ferrajoli, Rome in 2020. People like to discuss the lighting or figure, or colours of my painting. But those are not the things I consider while painting. The process of painting is to discover fully the image in my head, like meeting a part of myself.
The "Star River", in the beginning, to me, was the distance between the modern rules and conventions we chronically conform ourselves to and the concept which may provide us with our true identities; later on, it became the universe in which we find evidence for the mysterious energies that also lies within each one of us.
"...A figure merges from rocks and woods, from all that exist in future and past, as my pure senses and my faith, as my wish to bring you comfort and my devotion to love. The hunter came from far away, with his exhausted body and weary face and his heart full of sorrow, but his courage lies, like a young boy his spirit shines, in the human world he strives.
"Let me admire your gorges face, a life like fire that glows. Stand tall and be strong, go far on your journey, once again with courage and hope. All good wills shall be with you, forever to be companied by the strength of love which would lighten the wide world, find the truth for life which is so valuable, the gracious meaning of its eternal being. I will be by your side, telling the deepest wishes in my head, for your fervent heart to ignite a flame in the desolate night, for the light in the depth of my soul to light up your journey ahead. Come into my life. Find me who suffers as I request, and together walk on the rough path beneath you and I. In this endless night, close your eyes, in your heart, to the beginning of all lives, to the fertile land in radiance of joy, in the age of bitterness, let us return to a serene pride." -- Journal from 2013
