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- TRINITY -

2019

Beyond Star River

The Sound of the choir, the familiar rhythm has brought me back to 6 years ago. Lonely, standing in the remains of my studio with a mind flying to somewhere so far away. And now it has welcomed me to continue that journey.


- Journal 27/3/2019

Preface

It began in 2013. I was 21, got back from Rome, finished the series River & A Rose In Crevice, prepared to confront my fear and search for the meaning of life. Within an adventurous and rebellious mood my mind had started a journey, into the wilderness, into the ancient history, into the notions unveiled to me for the first time. What do human chase for? In questions of nature, faith, awareness I sought thirstily, while my body was trapped inside a social situation I repel. I walked among the incarnations of greed, puppets pulled by strings, listening to them demolishing the elegance and sacredness of words by using them to prettify shabby thoughts and wicked deeds, watching them faking a decency by putting on glamorous appearances and pretend its righteousness, and quietly, the conventional standard of success that I was once so familiar with, the former judgement of right and wrong, of beauty, of value… were crumbling so defiantly in my mind. 

 

There came a distance between me and the world around, between the appearances and truths I could see, between the ignorance of my past and the apperception I was reaching. And that distance, it is so wide and mysterious, like a river, a river of stars. “I look down, wishing to see the face of me, yet I see the whole universe.” 

 

I fell in love that summer, in a quite particular way. I found courage, to unshackle myself from many rules and to redefine my life, truly. It is a beautiful and emotional story, my treasure and strength. 

 

Six years later I reopened it. I found myself much stronger and calm. Now, with a closer look into the states of my mind, I came back with an expansion of it. Back in 2013 I was very determined with my choice, but I was also afraid of failure. Along my belief there was also a level of self convincing which have led me into hardship of revelation. I was eager and sometimes confused. Everything that was going on became subjects for me to detect and relate to a deeper understanding. While I was reaching out to a total new vision, from time to time I was also pulled around by rules enforced in earlier life. It was a constant battle, through which I experienced, learned and grew, and was flooded by emotions at all time. 

Figures and images have left me a clue. With it, through growth, I’ve been able to trace it down to a better understanding of the origin of my motives. Rather than expression, I begin to find painting a discovery. Each piece is built up by thousands of delicate decisions, through which pieces of myself, pieces of world that’s reflected in myself emerge, unreserved, uncovered, they are revealed to me and to anyone. In the end, it is a great thing to see the choice I’ve made and the wishes I hold toward life, toward world and humanity.

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The paintings are not meant to be religious. The characters are nothing related to the Father the Son the Holy Spirit, but are figures I came up with to represent visions I found through aspects of my own life. But as it turns out, it just made me understand something. To name love as the power of life, then, the structure of trinity may explain a process of how love works through human.

Hope

Fate

Shadow

60 x 100 cm
Oil on Canvas
Feb. 2019
80 x 100 cm
Oil on Canvas
Apr. 2019
60 x 100 cm
Oil on Canvas
Apr. 2019

The young man’s face is where I started this year. To look at him closely has made me realize the core of his meaning.  Through all what I was looking for, the river I was crossing, at last, there is him, Hope, rising out from a descending world of the past, facing a journey ahead.

 

Six years of aspiring a purpose seemed endless. In such kind of moment, I am glad to find myself looking upon the face of Hope

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Among the 3 characters, the older figure is the weary heart to be healed, the dark moments of life. So I named it "Shadow".

 

At first the 3 figures were each related to someone who inspired me in real life. The old man and the young were the 2 different aspects of one person, the ghost like figure is the same kind of sentiment from two persons. But as I proceed through painting this year, I discovered that even though the figures emerged to me based on my knowledge of actual people, together now they have become something that captures the states of my own mind, or of anyone. 

 

Sadness, tire, longing, comfort, intimacy, strength… and at last, hope. I can find all of them now in myself. 

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That female figure in "My Huntsman", is Fate. And it is formed by choices we make, with love it leads us. In 2013 while creating "Beyond Star River", I created this character basing on someone I knew, who had died yet remembered, loved. Later on the figure I've created became a representation of loving force in general. 

 

The beauty of love is eternal. Even with separation. Even with death. I’m glad to have witnessed it. The power it gives within form of consolation heals weary hearts. It is always the source of all that’s good.

My Love

40 x 60 cm
Oil on Canvas
Mar. 2019

Whisper

40 x 60 cm
Oil on Canvas
Mar. 2019
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In Memory & Dream

30 x 50 / 30 x 80 / 30 x 50 cm
Oil on Canvas
Mar. 2019
There is a new character, a horse. Love, in form of each choice we make, each phenomenon of the force of attraction, it builds up our fate. Like a carrier, for those who’re given the power of it.
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